Michael Tyler.

I am home now.

These are the costs involved with my trip to Amsterdam.

Flights – Jet2 single £19
Accommodation – 3 nights in Cosa Rosa €135.80
Cost of cigarrettes – €4.50 for 20
Cost of beer – €2.50
Entry to club – €10 with free drink
Entry to sex club – €45 with 4 drinks
Piece of Pizza – €2.90
Tram ticket – €1.60

All these things you can buy in Amsterdam.

The museums I visited cost the following:-

Heineken Museum – €5
Torture Musuem – €5
Hash Museum – €5

It’s not expensive.
I spent less than €400 in 5 days.

Yes, it’s probably the most famous sex show club in the Damm, with a penis fountain out front.
Harmless mixed xrowd make it feel a bit like a comedy night.

Spectacles include-
Girl blowing smoke rings through her badger.
Wanking monkey.
Various creeds – fucking couples, blonds, blacks, more blacks.

The couples sat on a giant rotating saucer.

Now this may sound really lame, but it wasn’t (honest), and it was pretty much the same as any other comedy night I’ve been to.

For those Americans reading, this is what real weed looks like.

With the European stuff, you have to mix it up with tobacco or you’ll fall off your stool.

Tyke tips

• Start with the short stuff and work your way up.
• Ask the barman/maid’s advise.
• Getting too stoned is like getting too drunk.
• If you’re going to drink and get stoned, drink first then get stoned, that way you won’t get sphinctal release.:)

Forgot all about the torture Museum.

I have pictured the fascinating torture relics below.

For sawing flesh.

Pinball for the coxics.

I’m not sure what torture this is, how it works or what the girls name was.

Goodbye torture
I was wondering what happened to torture, it’s definitely been popular in the past..

Big crowds used to gather to watch the fool in the stocks, whilst the crowd pelted him with fruit and rotten insults.

Bad
Some tortures where really bad, like putting people in chairs with nails and bits of plastic then melting the plastic whilst the nails heated up like syringes, filling the flesh with a hot plasticky, drippy substance.
painful.

All in the past
I’m certain this happened in the past, but the world is a happier place, now we have no part in torture, and we loath those individuals that perpetrate it.

I guess that the wars made sure everyone played fair, with the Geneva convention and what-not.

Yes, it may be the public face and curiosity with torture has truly disappeared into a bygone era, and the publics fascination with cruelty has disappeared.

What?
That’s what Museums are about, finding out about something, stimulating thoughts and wanting to know more.

And if you are in Amsterdam, be sure to visit the torture museum, it’s great.

I have the use of a car, like this.

Hopefully I will be able to fit my umberella in the back.

Spent most of the day travelling between, reading small pocketsized maps and visiting the museums below.

Took some time to buy some low-grade score from a reputable source and called it a day.

Is worth a visit.

In case you can’t find any filth or are too shy, you can visit the more reputable, high street face of sex, the sex museum located on Dammstrav about 200 yards away from central station.
The museum consists of many bits and pieces, sure to entertain and amuse, like a history of fucking, how it came about and how we can make money out of it..

Here’s a picture.

Meet new friends

Situated on the edges of some canals round the square. It’s almost as much fun finding it as going inside.
Here we can learn about dope, how nice it is and why we should smoke more of it.

This bloke has collected a lot of weed and put it on a lorry to drive round with.

Old smokers.

Weed.

Live and learn
If you have never known much about pot before coming to Amsterdam, this museum is definitely worth a visit.

Pot is not an accepted drug but its been around and actively used for 8,000 years in societies across the world from the Mesopotamia to the Indians and western Europeans.

It may take 8,000 more to try and wipe it out so why we bother is anyone’s guess.

I have captured the spledours of dutch innovation in industrial beer making, here is a sample.

The tour is made up of many things.

After passing through some history and corporate aspirational material, the beer production process is perhaps the reason most people come to the Heineken brewery.

Should be your first port of call, as they give you a free pint pitcher, which can come in handy if you are serving your own drinks late into the night in your own hotel-room.

I had been warned that there were many Museums in Amsterdam.

There are so many you’ll probably have to limit the time or choose the ones that suit you best.

Best of Three
Out of a combination of chance and bad map reading skills, the 3 I managed to take in were…