Chinese Cyclist vs Innocent Laowai (me)

Chinese Cyclist vs Innocent Laowai (me)

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Violent Chinese
Un-pleasant goat

I have a little story.

Today. Mid-day, walking back from Morning shift at work:

Busy pavement in the center Kunshan, man approaches me on his pushbike.

It’s usual to get bikes on the pavement in China, this guy was right in the middle of the pavement, not at the side, like you should be.

Also, he was heading in the wrong direction, even though there is no direction for pedestrians.

Bloke proceeds to head RIGHT toward me and I mean RIGHT at me. He hits me, and I push him out of the way, in the shoulder to avoid the full force of the blow. 

Guy hits the roof. Shouts a load of Chinese at me. Some other Chinese grab him and restrain him. I call him an Idiot, and carry on along my business. Walk off and get an e-bike.

Next thing I know, after picking up my e-bike, this guy has FOLLOWED me. From behind, can hear this grating sound near the back wheel, and as I turn round, there’s the guy trying to ram me from behind with his pushbike!

Now, those people who’ve tried this in their childhood will know, it’s not a good idea! I turn round to look at him, and he begins shouting and waving his arms, whilst one-handedly ramming me!
Not known for their multi-tasking, China style, and this guy was no exception, after what seemed like an eternity, I watched as he lost.. control.. and fell….
…All over the pavement.   😆  An angry pile of Chinese arms and legs. As I look back I can see him lying on the floor, surrounded by bemused Chinese shoppers, and carry on.

Along with my daily business.

Hammer Time

I decide after a little cycling, it’s time to confront. And he pulls up and grabs my shoulder coming out with all this Chinese, looking angry, and violent even.

Getting ready to throw the first punch.

I pick my words.

I open my eyes nice and wide and fix his little slanty ones and say the words very clearly
“F..V..C..K      O..F..F”.
I can see the words feeding into his upper cranium for filtering.

Chinese bloke spouts more Chinese, waving angry arms. Looking at me, it’s clear I don’t understand a word he’s saying.

Angry in the eyes, still looking for violence.

He looks at my eyes.

I look at his eyes.

A few seconds pass.

I repeat for him “F…V..C..K     O..F..F”.

After a few seconds, a crowd is gathering behind us. It’s right on a main street, probably, the main street in Kunshan.

Chinese weighs his options, large fight with lawoai on High Street of Kunshan. Or f*ck off.

He leaves, cycles off on bicycle, looking round. Angry.

I continue along my business.

China Crisis

My policy is. Ignore them. If they’re in your face, tell them to get out of it. Always be clear, always be serious.

I’ve had more trouble in this country than I’ve had at home, mostly because Chinese will try and take you for a fool because you’re foreign.

If you like being taken for a fool. You can put up with this. Otherwise, you can confront them. This is when the problems arise.

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